The layers of prayer: (I know there are countless other layers, but this
consecutively develops with the belief that there is a core.)

“Lord I give You everything I am…” (Said as if to barter)

“Lord I love You…” (As if to convince Him of your authenticity)

“Lord I want…” (As if He doesn’t already know)

“Please…” (Begging begins)

“I am sorry… (An attempt to make yourself worthy)

“I declare…” (Pretending you must not have done it right the last time)

“Your Word says…” (Begin debating)

“Where are You…?” (Emotions begin to take over)

“Are You deaf…?” (Begin accusations)

“I’ve done everything I know to do…” (Frustration, anger, and doubt in His covenant begin)

“Did I miss it/lose it…?” (Blame game)

“How long…?” (Begin to surrender)

“Prepare me for whatever You are doing…” (The end, usually said in bitter
frustration with a tinge of hope that there’s an end in sight)

No, I don’t pretend to understand what He’s up to, and no this is not the path of everyone. I believe He is good, and that it is not my faith that makes Him so. He is alive.

If He answers your prayers exactly as you have prayed them, amen. For the rest of us, after you’ve done everything, keep praying. I believe He wants to bring us in beyond the formulas and recipes. Perhaps He wants to show you something, or is preparing something- this, the “tinge of hope”.

Living with a disease while believing in an all-powerful and loving God is frustrating. It’s a personal thing and yet your issue becomes a litmus test to others of the quality of your faith. I could talk about symptoms I deal with but the most to be gained is maybe pity or more likely responses from the “Get over it!” crowd. They would tell all the stories of people who have been blown to bits and are now left with a finger and Mr. Bits learned to play an instrument with it. Very inspiring.

You do learn to “Live with it” like with an oppressive family member, but personally being left in that place which inspires many to become agnostics/angrynostics is a bit draining. People aside, you are left with a disease and an open sky. After doing all the introspection, forgiving everyone no matter if they change or not or brings your healing or not, speaking all the right words, reading all the healing Scriptures, pretending everyone else is right and you were wrong this whole time, plus countless other things, you are left with this open sky. It never left, it never changed even a little.

What do you do? Do you give your issue, that only you and He will ever truly understand, the power to separate you? Is it not one of the most personal things in the world? Love, though it’s not supposed to change, does here. Well, at least we do. Love is the most powerful thing on earth, and though it can bring change to the person it does nothing to change the disease.

I know many who have lost children before they were born or shortly after. It silences them and provides a burden that steals their joy. Only they and God know their pain. There is so much to say about this and people’s responses/reactions, but in the end, it is always a personal thing that others will never truly be able to comprehend.

What you believe when you look up to the open sky, regardless of what may come, directs your steps. The stubborn find other ways to get whatever enjoyment, even a portion of what they would have had if not for the loss, to continue. What does this look like? It could be involvement at an orphanage, spending time with kids who got to be born but don’t get to have the love of parents. It could be many things, but the point is letting loss either lead you to virtue or to vice.

In the end, we all have the chance of life here. What do you want to do with it? What if your disease or loss has nothing to do with the quality of your faith? What if what you do after shows more about it? To the stubborn, I salute you. I think it makes God smile if not gives you something to smile about.

We are all Mr. Bits, if we think about it. Unrequited love, failure, disease, loss, maybe these are enough to bring forth a song or a poem that can help others carry their burdens along underneath this open sky.

I’ll never forget a poem I read from Gregory Orr:
“To be alive: not just the carcass
But the spark.
That’s crudely put, but…
If we’re not supposed to dance,
Why all this music?”

He had accidentally shot and killed his brother while they were out hunting.

This life is broken. Why do some get to be rich and healthy while others don’t? Do we play the part to make definitions work? Why shoot for consistency when everything here isn’t? I say, either rich and healthy or poor and on your deathbed, serving God is the best way to spend your moments here, however few.

And from this Mr. Bits to you, no one will say this for fear of judgment, but it’s the best way to get revenge on your loss. Serving your Angry-nosticism just leaves you angry, serving God gives life no loss can take away.

I’m starting to think wisdom is a mathematical equation.

All education is pattern because the Pattern Maker makes it so. Is it really that much of a stretch to understand He made a pattern of Life that fulfills the Fall of man?

He set forth and showed us an equation that fulfills wisdom itself.

Wisdom was given to man to show us how the equation worked. Jesus came to fulfill the equation beyond wisdom’s power.

I’m seeing the book of Proverbs as a math book. If we’re left with its limits, then the Old Covenant stands. It was what was put in place to help man of his own efforts of sacrifice and blood.

With Wisdom, God created all that is. Jesus was there. Hebrews says Jesus is the Heir of all things and “through whom He made the universe”. How else does wisdom stand?

Faithfulness and righteousness were the fulfillment of those who dwell with wisdom. Jesus was/is/ever will be the Righteous One.

We knew of the answer we hoped for: the salvation of man. I know of those who hate the equation, who see the fact that there is one as proof of God’s cruelty. If He knew, then why the charade of the Garden? But I would say that though He knew it would come to this, there were plans for greater things. I wonder of the comparison of God’s questioning of Adam in the Garden with the plea of Jesus while also in one.

Two discussions with God in gardens that held the fate of mankind in their wake. One for our condemnation, the other ultimately for our salvation. Both tests, one failed, the other fulfilled.

There are voices in Scripture that wish we could have made it work, from the Garden to the Temple, but they spoke of ever less than the fulfillment to come in Jesus.

If anything the equation of wisdom shows us our need for more, but no one knew what He had in store.

Numbers get fulfilled with concepts. In Proverbs, it would be: The undiscerning + listening to a gossip = folly. And Hebrews chapter 4: Hearing the Gospel + Faith = Rest.

I know it’s a bit elementary, but it makes sense to me with the plethora of proverbs that each give little bits of info to paint a bigger picture of wisdom in a fallen world. Then when we think of Jesus, we see firsthand how He flips it on its head and fulfills it.

If we only knew how many depend on our vote around the globe. We’ve seen the eroding a poor choice can do. I wonder about our moral compass. Are we so
happy to free ourselves of conscience before we even consider how intrinsically it is connected to our freedom? As we look around and remember to value others better than ourselves we see the nations, their economies, their past, and their future. We see them, when left on their own, trample the poor. We watch them destroy history and ravage cultures. We know our own nation’s sordid past and valor.

It is interesting how time changes definitions. What one time considered heroic another considers villainy. How do we know, to what do we compare? Does
anyone even care?

I know when something demands my attention my initial reaction is to ignore. When something tells me the fabric of our reality depends on my choice, I tend to downplay it. Unfortunately the gravity of a situation is only visible from hindsight, because I am woefully immature. I know that there is a higher rock, but there is no higher ground here, not in this life. Greed, greed, greed. It is the way of the world. It is how nations are formed, governed, and defended. Statistics are its study,
theology its ethic.

Every election time I see the world spread its wings like a peacock. The colors
dazzle, the importance overwhelming. Is it any better to close your eyes and flip a coin? So many have died to allow us the choice. Did their lives matter, their
sacrifice, or was it all in vain as we watch machines we’ve made take on a life of their own making our hopes, that have gotten misaligned, into a Grima Wormtongue?

Fading, fading, fading is this world, which makes its grasp all the more desperate. Can you feel it? Do you sense it, the overwhelming presence dominating your thoughts? Concern for your wife, your kids, future generations is how it starts. Then in its grip your vision narrows till finally all you see is you.

Till then comes a Man. We, sinking in the swirling waves of greed and shame, look up to see His feet standing atop it all. He looks down upon our fate as each of our hands bring more of the fetid putrescence to our lips, at once sweet then violently bitter and horrid. We wretch, our own body tosses out what we so willingly put in. Our hands are already busy trying to return this doomed and exiled vomit to our mouths. Tears in our eyes at our helpless state, we see Him reach out His hand to ours.

A choice, stronger than a vote for its binding is eternal, is ours to make. Do we take His hand to pull us from what we can’t let go or do we ignore its importance and swallow another gulp? What do you choose? The kingdom of this world, or the Kingdom of Heaven?

This voting season is important, but lets not confuse its amount. I would rather us see it as a doorway into the Divine. If voting for the presidency is this important, upon which so many in this fading world depend, what about your soul? What about your decisions of each and every moment of the day? Does it really matter that much? People died so we can vote and not live under the oppression of the crown. One Man died to give us His. He alone frees us from the oppression of this fading world, of its greed. Do not turn away, now is the time more than ever because for a moment, we see the value in a choice.

When you vote, think on Him, and know that with Him your decision is secure. Gain your strength follower of Christ. Do not be conformed by the promises you see here. Walk with Jesus, and know that atop the waves with Him is surer ground than any you will find here.

May His Name Be Praised!!!

“Always know that the only higher ground is on top of the waves.”